


Kisses and Confessions

by Midnite521



Category: Linkin Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Girlfriends/No Wives, Cuddling & Snuggling, Declarations Of Love, Falling In Love, First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M, Making Out, No Smut, Shyness, Swearing, bennoda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2018-08-19
Packaged: 2019-06-29 20:14:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15736569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Midnite521/pseuds/Midnite521
Summary: Chester tends to get nervous before shows and so Mike comes up with an idea





	Kisses and Confessions

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys like it!
> 
> (This has been on my computer for a few months and I've reread it a few times to make some adjustments)
> 
> I've been procrastinating on publishing this since I couldn't decide if it was alright or not so I hope it is lol

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You ready, Ches?” Mike asked the nervous blond, who couldn’t stop peeking towards the stage anxiously as he wrung his hands together. They were all pretty nervous tonight- thousands of people in the crowd waiting to hear them perform. Though at the same time, Mike felt as excited as he was nervous. He wasn’t sure if the same could be said for Chester, who was biting his lip as his eyes met Mike’s.

 

“Am I ready to sing in front of  _ thousands  _ of people for the first time? Honestly Mike? I’m not so sure…” He answered in a hesitant voice, rubbing the back of his neck as he took a few steps away from the stage. “I don’t feel like I can go out there without freezing up or even getting sick to my stomach.”

 

Mike laughed under his breath, noticing that Chester must’ve heard as he got a slight glare. “You’ve performed in front of people before, haven’t you? When you were in Grey Daze?” He got a laugh of disbelief as Chester crossed his arms.

 

“We only ever performed in small spaces like nightclubs or bars where only maybe fifty to a hundred people showed up at the most to listen to us. This place is a hell of a lot bigger than a nightclub, Mikey…” He looked down to the floor as he rocked himself back and forth on his feet slightly, lowering his voice as it shook a little. “I don’t think I can do this…”

 

Mike sighed softly as he made his way over to the singer and placed his hands carefully on his shoulders to get his attention- and to try and quell the small anxiety attack he seemed to be having at the moment. Chester looked up at him apprehensively through his glasses as Mike gave him a small, reassuring smile. “We’re all scared, Chester... It’s one of our biggest shows so far. But we’re all here for each other if we need it. That includes you.”

 

“I haven’t known you since school like the other guys, though.” He heard Chester mumble. Mike shook his head in response.

 

“That doesn’t matter. You’re apart of the band now, you’re one of us. We’re all friends, Ches.” He gently pulled him into a hug, resting his chin on Chester’s shoulder and closing his eyes when he heard a shaky intake of breath before he felt arms wrap around him, feeling as Chester clutched onto his shirt tightly. “You can  _ do  _ this. I’ll be right by your side the entire time- I promise.” Mike murmured, holding onto Chester a little longer before letting go as he felt a vague nod in response. Chester looked at him for a moment before quickly leaning forward and briefly pressing his lips against Mike’s, making Mike freeze as he let out a low gasp- his face suddenly warm as Chester backed away with widened eyes as if realizing what he’d just done. He was speechless as he watched a blush immediately form on the blond’s face.

 

“I... Mike, I... Fuck, I’m so sorry. I- I didn’t mean to…” Mike watched as Chester bit his lip nervously as he looked at the floor again and wrung his hands together, his voice lowering to a whisper as if he were trying not to cry. “I wasn’t thinking. I probably just fucked everything up again…” He said the last part more to himself.

 

When Mike was able to snap out of whatever trance he was in, he looked at the singer more clearly, who seemed to be trembling and letting out short, panicked breaths as he wrapped his arms around himself. The emcee placed a hand on his shoulder again carefully, wincing when he felt Chester flinch away from his touch. “Ches. Chester, look at me.” He said gently, once again trying to get his attention by lifting his chin so they were face to face. “You didn’t fuck anything up, alright? I was just... surprised, is all.” He told him, smiling slightly. Before Chester could try and deny anything, Mike spoke again. “I’m serious. Everything’s fine.”

 

“Friends don’t just kiss each other and think it’s perfectly normal.” Chester argued defiantly, frowning.

 

“I know, I know.” Mike sighed, running a hand through his spiky hair before an idea formed in his head a few seconds later. “Did... did kissing me make you feel any better?” He asked, getting a confused look in response.

 

“...What?” Chester asked under his breath.

 

“Did it?” He pressed, waiting for a response. The singer stood silently for a moment as he fully took in the question before stuttering out an answer, the blush returning to his face.

 

“W-well um, I mean... maybe? Just a little?”

 

“Then... can I?” Mike asked cautiously, moving closer ever-so-slightly. Chester laughed weakly.

 

“You’re... you’re kidding, right?” He asked, though making no move to back away whatsoever. Mike shook his head lightly.

 

“I really want to kiss you, Ches…” He breathed, making Chester’s own breath hitch when he saw Mike’s eyes look down towards his lips. “ _ And  _ if it’ll help make you feel less worried about performing…” He trailed off, smirking a little. Chester rolled his eyes, but that didn’t stop his heart from beating slightly faster at the thought. He licked his lips before swallowing nervously, nodding somewhat as his eyes wandered.

 

“Okay.” He said in a hushed tone, making Mike quickly but carefully move them to a more secluded area backstage so no one could spot them as he then closed the rest of the small distance between them. It was his turn to gasp almost noiselessly as he shyly returned the kiss. He gripped tightly onto the emcee’s shirt again as they parted for a short breath before continuing. 

 

Mike moved his hands to cup Chester’s face, gently tracing a thumb along his jawline and making him shiver involuntarily.

 

_ “I didn’t think I’d ever be kissing another guy- let alone my best friend.”  _ They both thought at the same time.  _ “I didn’t ever think it’d feel this... nice…” _

 

Mike made sure to be careful of his movements, and not going any further than just slow, soft kisses and feather-light touches. It was then that he realized, reluctantly, that they’d been called to go out on stage- and so he broke away- the almost silence broken by their breathing. He almost chuckled at the dazed expression on the singer’s face- instead opting to grin as he tried to get his attention.

 

“Chester.” He murmured as he ran a thumb along his jaw again.

 

“Mm?” Chester hummed lazily in response, not really paying attention to anything. Mike kept his voice low as he tried again, this time laughing quietly.

 

“We need to go out on stage now, Ches.”

 

“Mmm but do we really  _ need  _ to go out there? I’d rather stay here.” He whined.

 

“Yes, we really need to go out there,” Mike chuckled. “We can’t stay here all day. Let’s go.” He heard Chester let out a defeated sigh before he released the grip on his shirt, listening as he muttered out a ‘fine’ before backing away to look at him.

 

“Alright. Let’s go then, shall we?”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Kisses became a thing that happened before shows every so often, usually every other week or month- or when Chester was feeling particularly anxious about a show- and they even continued through the Meteora world tour. They never did so after shows since they were usually too busy with other things right after or were just exhausted from performing.

 

They never went past gentle kisses and touches, and were careful enough to not be seen by any of the band members or anyone else who happened to be with them on that particular day. To everyone else, they were just close friends. That’s all they ever needed to know- something both men agreed on. This was their little secret for now.

 

They became less frequent when both Mike and Chester started on their own little side projects for a while- though they still tried to communicate whenever they weren’t busy- and both were careful with what they spoke about on the phone in case anyone were to be listening.

 

Kissing became even less frequent the more famous they got- with things becoming more stressful and hectic with writing and creating songs for Minutes To Midnight and A Thousand Suns- and Chester felt more confident about going out on stage to sing. Mike didn’t want to admit it, but he’d begun to miss being alone with the singer. He’d hope, but every time it just seemed as if Chester was ready to sing for the audience- with more energy than the rest of the band combined. He wouldn’t tell him about the pang he felt in his chest when those moments came. He  _ was  _ happy with whatever moment he did manage to be in, however infrequent those were.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Although it’d felt like years to him, there was finally a time during Hunting Party where they had over a hundred thousand people in the audience. He’d figured that Chester had gotten over his slight fear of going out in front of thousands of people- but he’d been proven wrong when he’d found Chester pacing anxiously in the dressing room alone- taking deep breaths to try and calm himself. Mike closed the door behind him, locking it just in case anyone were to try and come in as he calmed Chester down.

 

“Everything alright Ches?” Mike asked quietly as he walked over to where he was now standing. “Haven’t seen you like this in a while. Is it about tonight’s show?” 

 

“Kinda, yeah.” He responded, letting out another breath and trying not to let the shakiness of his voice show (but sort of failing). “A lot of people out there...”

 

“You’re not at least a  _ little  _ bit excited?”

 

“I am.” Chester responded before Mike could speak again, turning to face him now. “But the excitement that I  _ do  _ have is overshadowed by the overwhelming amount of anxiety I’m feeling right now.”

 

“Anything I can do to help?” Mike asked him, concern in his voice. He was hoping he’d be okay enough to go out on stage and that it wasn’t another similar situation like their first show together where he almost didn’t perform.

 

“Yes, actually…” Chester answered as he moved closer, staring at the floor for a moment as he tentatively reached for and curled his fingers around Mike’s jacket, who in return held his breath while his heart thumped loudly. He fought against the urge to smile in amusement when he noticed just how he was acting. When Chester looked up and noticed, he raised an eyebrow. “What’s so funny Shinoda? I miss something?”

 

Mike laughed a little as he smirked. “Isn’t thirty-eight a little too old to be acting shy around someone there, Bennington?” He copied teasingly. Chester scoffed, rolling his eyes before moving close enough so they were now only inches apart.

 

“We only have a few minutes before we’re due out there and someone comes knocking at the door.” Chester breathed against Mike’s mouth, teasing him right back as he now gripped his jacket tighter. Mike bit down on his lip as to not make a sound. “So do you want to kiss me or not?”

 

Mike nodded, closing his eyes as he whispered a ‘yes’ before placing his hands on Chester’s face and pulling him in desperately. A small noise sounded in the back of Chester’s throat at the unexpected urgency of this kiss.

 

“Mike…” He gasped in surprise, getting a little air back in the process.

 

“Sorry,” Mike murmured apologetically, pausing for a few seconds before kissing him again- a tad lighter this time. “Feels like it’s been too long since we’ve been able to do this.”

 

He heard Chester laugh under his breath before answering. “Keep kissing me like that and we won’t make it in time for the show.”

 

“Oh, really?” Mike asked, a hint of a challenge in his voice as he grinned slightly, watching as Chester licked his lips before kissing him again, going slower this time as he opened his mouth just a little. “How about this one?”

 

“This one’s  _ worse _ .” Chester complained. “You’re going too slow.” 

 

“That’s the point. It leaves you wanting more.” He answered, pressing their mouths together one last time, this one lasting a little longer, pulling away a bit and kissing the corner of the singer’s mouth before moving away just as there was a knock on the door to signal for them to go. Grinning slyly, he turned and started to head out. “Time to go, Ches.” He called over his shoulder.

 

“What the hell, Mike- you can’t do that to me then just leave!” He yelled, jogging to catch up with him. When he caught up, he glared up at the emcee, making him laugh in response as they continued their way to the stage. He didn’t tell him how he secretly wanted to be close to him again.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


It was hard for Mike to concentrate and keep his eyes off of Chester for most of the show, but he surprisingly managed without anyone noticing anything was off. Well, anyone in the audience, anyway, since he  _ did  _ get a couple looks from some of the guys. He felt thankful that no one decided to question him in between songs.

 

When the show was over, he’d asked Chester if they could possibly meet in his room when they got back to the hotel they were staying at- getting a slight nod and smile as he told him it’d be okay. When the other guys went up to their respective rooms for the night, Mike stealthily slipped his fingers through Chester’s as they quickly but cautiously made their way to his room and locking the door behind them. Without letting go of his hand, Mike pulled them towards the bed and sat on the edge before turning to face the singer- who in turn looked at him with a mix of curiosity and concern.

 

“Something wrong?” He asked, not noticing the slight blush on Mike’s face as they continued to hold hands. Mike swallowed hard as he thought about what he was going to say. 

 

“Well... actually, Ches... I, um…” He started, rubbing the back of his neck as he grew more tense. “There’s something I want-” He stopped himself for a second. “No-  _ need _ to tell you.” Chester watched him for a second, gauging the expression on his face before something seemed to click.

 

“Is... is it about the kissing? From earlier?” He asked, almost hesitant. Mike sucked in a breath as he nodded, preparing himself.

 

“It’s about all the times we’ve kissed, actually.” He responded, his voice wavering a little. “I-” He sighed, putting his head down a little. “I know we’re best friends, and that we’ve only done it when you needed to, but…” He paused, closing his eyes as his voice lowered to just above a whisper. “I kinda wish I could kiss you more than just before shows.” He confessed, his face growing warmer as he went on. “I think about it a lot... the feelings I’ve had towards you over the years and how much they’ve grown to the point where I care about you more than a best friend should.”

 

“Oh…” Chester whispered in response after a few moments, almost unheard by Mike as the stillness of the moment dragged on a little too long for his liking.

 

Mike grew more uncomfortable the longer Chester stayed silent, and he almost looked up when he replied to his confession- emotion in his voice.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier…?”

 

“Wasn’t sure if you felt the same towards me.” Mike answered lamely, shrugging. He looked up in surprise, blinking a few times when he felt Chester squeeze his hand gently.

 

“You really think I wouldn’t feel the same way for about as long as you have? If I didn’t do you think I’d have kissed you back all those times?” He joked lightly, chuckling a little as he grinned and moved a little closer, his breath warm on Mike’s face.

 

“Then you wouldn’t mind if I did it again?” He asked sheepishly, smiling lopsidedly.

 

“Would you?” Chester breathed, brushing their lips together as his grin widened.

 

Placing a hand against his neck with a caress, Mike slowly placed a tentative kiss to his lips, as if testing the waters and pausing when he heard Chester let out a shaky sigh.

 

“Don’t stop this time.” Mike heard him plead softly. “Please…” Breaking whatever ounce of control he had up until this point, he cupped his face as he pulled him as close as he could, kissing him like he hadn’t gotten to do so in years and never would again.

 

He opened his mouth slightly, shuddering at the feeling as it got more intense than all the other times- Chester wrapping his arms around the back of his neck as they leaned back onto the bed after a few minutes. Placing his hands on either side as he leaned over the older man, Mike’s eyes lazily wandered over him in adoration as his lips grazed his collarbone and went up along his neck and jawline and getting a whine in response as his back arched just slightly.

 

Chester then let out a low moan, his grip tightening again as the younger man left gentle bites and licks on his neck.

 

“Fuck, how are you so good at this…” Chester breathed raggedly. “You haven’t done this with anyone else, have you?”

 

“Only you, far as I know.” He mumbled with a smirk as he moved up higher.

 

“Pretty damn impressive for your first time then, Mikey…” He gasped before lips pressed against his again fervently in open mouthed kisses instead of answering his statement, their hands roaming and searching aimlessly.

  
  
  


-

 

The kissing and exploring lasted for what felt like hours, both Mike and Chester now lying side by side, their kisses gradually getting lazier as they lingered longer to catch their breaths.

 

“I love you, Ches.” Mike said affectionately as he held Chester close, his arms around him. Choking up, Chester laughed weakly, tears threatening to spill as he nuzzled into the crook of Mike’s neck and closed his eyes.

 

“I love you too.” He whispered, not trusting his voice as he figured it’d just crack from the emotion he felt. “So much.”

  
  


Instead of going back to his own room, Chester decided he’d stay the rest of the night. He was too comfy to move anyway- a content smile on his face as they eventually drifted off to sleep.


End file.
